


Ophidiophobia

by lesmiserablol



Category: Les Misérables - All Media Types
Genre: Humor, Kissing, M/M, Snakes
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-09-28
Updated: 2015-09-28
Packaged: 2018-04-23 19:11:01
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,032
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4888672
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lesmiserablol/pseuds/lesmiserablol
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Enjolras has a fear. Grantaire has a secret.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Ophidiophobia

"How come we never go to your place?"

Enjolras and Grantaire have just left the Musain, waving goodbye to everyone that is still there chatting with each other on their way out. Enjolras had reached out to grab the other's hand and had hesitated before asking the question that had been on his mind recently. Ever since they had gotten together, they always walked back to Enjolras's apartment after each meeting to have some coffee and maybe some kisses. Or a lot of kisses. The coffee tended to go cold on the table as they had a make out session on the couch.

Grantaire rubs circles on the back of Enjolras's hand with his thumb as he thinks about the question for a few moments. "You make good coffee."

Enjolras rolls his eyes. "I can make good coffee at your apartment."

"True." Grantaire admits with a nod. "But, uh, your apartment is closer."

"Not by much." Enjolras points out.

"Also true." Grantaire shrugs. "Er, I also live with Bahorel, and he often forgets it's his job to do the dishes."

"I don't mind." Enjolras tells him. It wasn't like he'd spend much time looking around the apartment.

"Alright, what's this about? You've never seemed to care that we always go to your place."

Enjolras shakes his head. "Nothing, I just..."

"Oh!" Grantaire exclaims. "I know! You're afraid of walking in on Combeferre and Courfeyrac."

"How'd you know?" Enjolras raises an eyebrow.

"I'm smarter than you give me credit for. AKA, lucky guess. Has it happened before?"

"Yeah." Enjolras confirms. "Two days ago. I walked inside the apartment and they were kissing very passionately in the kitchen. Shirtless. Courfeyrac pinned against the fridge. I haven't been able to touch it since then. It was graphic."

"I think we've done worse." Grantaire frowns. "Didn't they just get together last week? We didn't make out in the kitchen until a month into our relationship."

"Yeah, but they've been pining after each other for years. Lots of sexual frustration."

"I guess that's right. Did they leave before us?"

"Yeah, about fifteen minutes ago."

"Well," Grantaire stalls. "I guess we can go to my place, if you really want. Bahorel told me he's going to be up late drinking with Feuilly and Eponine tonight."

"Alright, thank you." Enjolras smiles. "Walking in on my best friends like that scarred me for life."

Grantaire chuckles. "I once walked in on Bahorel and Feuilly cuddling on our couch. It was so disgustingly cute I couldn't look them in the eyes for days."

Enjolras rolls his eyes and squeezes his hand tighter as they approach Grantaire's apartment, changing the topic to Grantaire's latest art project. He smiles fondly at the way his boyfriend's eyes light up as he talks.

Grantaire pauses outside his door and jingles his keys for a few seconds. "Uh, you haven't been over in a long time, so you should know some things have, uh, changed."

Enjolras rolls his eyes. "Just let us in before I start kissing you out here."

"Hmm," Grantaire ponders that for a moment with a sly smile before unlocking his door and stepping inside. Enjolras follows and almost immediately grabs Grantaire and pushes him against the door, closing it and standing on his tip toes to meet Grantaire's lips with his own. "Um, Enjolras?" Grantaire asks against his lips after a few blissful moments. "I need to, uh, check on something."

"What?" Enjolras pulls away with a frown. "Wait, are you hiding something from me?"

"What? No, no, of course not! How about you start the coffee?"

Enjolras isn't convinced but he walks into the kitchen anyways. Grantaire disappears into the living room, eventually opening some of the doors in the hallway. By the time the coffee is done, Grantaire comes back, looking more relaxed and wearing an easy smile.

"Everything good?" Enjolras asks.

"Yeah, all good. Coffee done?"

"It can wait." Enjolras steps closer.

"You're a sap." Grantaire rolls his eyes but meets him halfway in another kiss anyways. They share some slow and lazy kisses, but Enjolras pulls away when he feels something on his foot.

"What the-" He mutters, then looks down and lets out a high pitched scream.

"Shit!" Grantaire yells, lunging towards the ground as Enjolras jumps away and rushes to the opposite side of the room.

"What is that?" He shrieks, pointing at the creature in Grantaire's hands.

"It's a snake." Grantaire tells him plainly.

"I can see that!" Enjolras says, his voice still high pitched. "Why is there a snake?"

"Bahorel thought it'd be a good idea to get some as pets. They get out of their cages often so I checked to see if they were all locked up, but I forgot he got a new one today. Meet Petunia!"

Enjolras continues to stare at it with wide eyes, now holding a frying pan in defense. "You know I hate snakes. Why didn't you tell me you have snakes?"

"You nearly peed yourself a few weeks ago when you mistook a piece of rope outside the mall for a snake. If I had told you I had snakes at the beginning of our relationship I wouldn't be surprised if you moved away to get away from them."

Enjolras scoffs and crosses his arms but doesn't deny anything. "A warning would've been appreciated. It would have been nice to know there was a possibility of a snake crawling on my foot!" There is still a note of hysteria in his voice so Grantaire sighs.

"Babe, calm down, I'll put Petunia away and then we can have our coffee, alright?"

Enjolras nods quickly and watches him leave the room. Grantaire places Petunia in a cage with another snake and hears something break in the kitchen. Rolling his eyes, he returns to find Enjolras cleaning up the remainder of one of his mugs.

"Sorry about that, I thought I saw another one." He mutters, glancing in the direction of Bahorel's neon pink shoelaces on the table.

Grantaire smirks. "Would you like to go to your apartment now?"

"Yes please." Enjolras dumps the trash and brushes off his hands, practically running out the door and into the hallway.

**Author's Note:**

> Just a fun little story I put together in the car, hope you enjoyed it!!


End file.
